September 1

“Sin is for us an already conquered foe.  The Lord Jesus Christ has met and conquered it, and we are, if we only knew it, more than conquerors in him.”  Hannah Whitall Smith, Daily Secrets, 8/31

I watched the second film of the trilogy, The Lord of the Rings:  Two Towers, last night.  It was very disturbing and is perhaps why I woke up two hours earlier than I normally do.  In these early morning hours, though, God often shows me things that I can only see that time of day.  In this second film the main characters have survived an intense battle that almost overwhelmed them.  The movie ends with a victory of that battle but also with the declaration that the war was just beginning.  For me, I often experience a victory over a sin, only to be re-engaged in battle.  Like the king in the film I become discouraged and want to just give up and let the enemy overtake me.  But then the word of the Lord encourages me and I ride into battle again.  This morning the Lord has shown me that the war hasn’t even begun for me.  Victory over sin has already been won, but I must go to war over it before it will quit attacking me and engaging me in battle.  The battles I’ve been experiencing have merely been the effects of my sin, but now, the Lord has shown me my sin itself.   I need not fear, however, because the war has already been won.  It is in riding into war--that is to say, facing my sin--that it shall be put to death for me.  Christ has already won the war, but now I must experience the victory of the battle for myself.

“Thus says the LORD to you, ‘Fear not, and be not dismayed at this great multitude; for the battle is not yours but God’s.”  2 Chronicles 20:15b

June 9

“The day of knowledge will dawn for us when we come to the point of implicitly believing God!  It must be understood, however, that this knowledge will come to us not as a feeling but as a perception.”  Hannah Whitall Smith, God is Enough, 6/9

To perceive is to become aware of.  Yesterday I felt down, but I was aware that it would pass.  It always does.  So I “laid low” being careful not to “share” my feelings with anyone else.  I had already “shared” too much with someone on a day I wasn’t feeling so great and now I felt I’d made a mess of the situation.  But then, those are just my feelings.  I really don’t know how the other person has perceived what has happened.  They’d already gotten one thing wrong because they hadn’t asked--they’d made an assumption.  I’ve turned this over to the Lord and have asked Him to clear up the matter.  I have no idea if I’m to make the first move or if the other person will.  For now I will wait.  All I can do is keep my heart open and trust that the Lord will work through it at the appropriate time.  This morning I heard a story on the radio about a man who’d taken in a mentally-challenged man for a short time when his own family wouldn’t have him.  Many years later the two were placed in the same nursing home.  Now the younger man looked after the feeble old man.  As I listened I became aware of the assurance I have from God that He will always look after me.  This was not a feeling.  It was something I perceived and it’s far greater than any feeling I could possibly have.

“This is why I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand.”  Matthew 13:13

April 14

“One of the great heart-cries of men and women everywhere and under all circumstances is for “confidence”......Some “insecurity” shows itself in cringing and shyness.  Some in egotism and boasting.”  Eugenia Price, S.P.S., 4/14

Lack of confidence has been one of my struggles.  I’ve exhibited it in both arenas:  cringing and egotism.  I usually start off holding back.  This is easy to label “insecurity”.  It feels comfortable because I at least feel as though no one has noticed.  But once I find my voice and step out of the shadow I usually find myself past confidence into egotism.  Why do I have such a hard time with this?  It’s obvious that what I’m calling confidence is not the right kind of confidence.  As long as “self” is attached to it it can never be enough.  Self is rightfully insecure because it knows it is standing on shaky ground. Whether I’m acting shy or am boasting, my need for confidence can never be satisfied.  Both are just cover-ups for my insecurity.   Only the confidence that comes from God stands on firm ground--the Rock, Himself.   In Him only can I find security.

“No man has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.  By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his own Spirit.”  1 John 4:12, 13