March 31

“Just as you believed at first that He delivered you from the guilt of sin because He said it so, now believe that He delivers you from the power of sin because He says it.”  Hannah Whitall Smith, God is Enough, 3/31

Today I am still dealing with the repercussions of the sin I spoke of yesterday--that of having taken on a burden that God had not placed on me.  I am discovering, after much soul searching, just what this bad feeling is that I’m still experiencing toward this person.  At first I called it “protection from being hurt”--a defense mechanism I learned early in life.  But this violates the law of love, which is to love even my enemy--not from behind a wall, but, instead, to minister to them.  Once I acknowledged this as sin and asked God to deliver me from it, what was uncovered was another sin--retaliation.  Like a stain in the carpet that went unnoticed until the clutter was picked up off the floor, my sin of revenge, long-hidden, acting as a diversionary tactic, was causing me to cling to my seemingly innocent need to protect myself.  No wonder I was having trouble trusting God to protect me.  That was not what I was truly seeking.  It was revenge I desired.   That is what I really need to be delivered from.

“Repay no one evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all.  If possible, so far as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’ No, ‘if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head.’  Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”  Romans 12:17-21