September 16

“Before, I might be able to say at any given moment, ‘I am the Lord’s now, altogether and unreservedly.’  But my will always took comfort in the thought of a future, when perhaps I would not be entirely His; secretly and almost unconsciously, I made a future provision for the flesh, to fulfill the desires thereof.”  Hannah Whitall Smith, God is Enough, 9/13

Hannah wrote the above in her diary in 1868 when she was 36 years old, ten years after giving her life to Christ. I think many of us are still waiting for this revelation of how our wills secretly take comfort in knowing it can take control back.  This is why we give it up so freely at times.  But if we look carefully I’m sure that those times were only when it was convenient or to our advantage in some way.  The cleverer we are the more adept we are at giving up our wills in a way that looks “godly”.  God warns us that our hearts are capable of even deceiving ourselves!  Hannah finally dealt with this sin in her life by seeing the future as belonging to God.  She does not go on to explain, but I can because I know what she’s talking about because I, too, continually make future provisions for the flesh.  I understand now that when I worry I am making this future provision for the flesh.  When I worry I am not seeing my future as belonging to God.  Lord, when I am tempted to “make provisions for my future” I will take comfort instead in the fact that my future belongs to You just as much as right now does.

“And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be of anxious mind.  For all the nations of the world seek these things; and your Father knows that you need them.  Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things shall be yours as well.”   Luke 12:29-31