January 22

“You will be incapable of ministering to everyone God sends you unless you have His love....Seek to know the Father and His immeasurable love; then allow His Son to love others through you!”  H. Blackaby, Experiencing God Day-by-Day, 1/22

It would seem that “I need only step aside” when it comes to loving people, as well--not only when it comes to letting God fight the battle in my mind.  The fact that I haven’t seen this before shows how much I stand in the way.  I’m beginning to see this picture of a woman busily working in her kitchen trying to cook for her large family while all the while there’s a helper knocking on her door, but because she’s so busy she doesn’t take the time to answer the door.   My need to be in charge of my life has distracted me from seeing how ready and able God has been to supply me with everything I need.   Why I’ve felt I’ve needed to do it all myself I don’t know.  Or do I?  Is it because I need to feel as though I’ve accomplished this great feat to love that unbearable person so that I feel accomplished?  Or do I need to be in control of the love I give so that I can protect myself if I begin to feel too vulnerable?  Either one of these reasons show me why I need to rest only in God’s love for me.  That is where I will get my self-worth issues satisfied and my fears relieved.

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”  Matthew 11:28-30